In 1980, I first encountered the writing of Paulo Freire (1970/1997) as a divinity student studying liberation theology. Though I had difficulty with the sexist language of the 1970 version and puzzled over the dualities of oppressed and oppressor, I appreciated his perceptions about banking education and valued his views on praxis and conscientização.¹ I found ways to integrate action/reflection into my work as a community and feminist/lesbian activist and civic participant. In recent years, as a student in critical pedagogy, I revisited Freire’s writings to more deeply appreciate reading the word and the world. In some ways, I have come full circle.

The journey towards this dissertation project and the visioning of WE LEARN began many years before I entered the doctoral program in critical pedagogy. My interest in women’s literacy did not originate from the field of education but evolved from my 20 years of experience as a professional in the book industry. I have worked in many aspects of this field&endash;bookselling (wholesale, distribution, and retail); marketing, publicity and promotion; publishing; writing; collecting; and reviewing. My expertise centers mostly in the areas of small, independent, and alternative presses. For the past ten years, I have worked exclusively as an activist in the feminist book arena (Women in Print). I understand my professional work not as "doing business" but as a significant contribution to the building of cultural and social movements against all forms of oppression. This dissertation project continues the spiral of action and reflection moving through years of work/career and political action experience.

To place this dissertation project in context, Claiming My Place reflects on those earlier years to illustrate a process of conscientização -- the development of a reflective practitioner committed to anti-oppression activism through the power of feminist publishing.

Pre-consciousness (1990-1993)

When I came out as lesbian in the late 1970s and early 1980s while developing a feminist consciousness, I relied&endash;hungrily and secretly&endash;on the few reading materials I could find to help me understand and explore my feelings and identity. Since 1982&endash;through my connections in activism and book industry work&endash;I have met hundreds of women with similar experiences for whom the access to feminist and lesbian literature has impacted, changed, even saved their lives. They, too, sought information and support about the experiences affecting their lives: healing from sexual abuse or domestic violence; understanding health issues such as breast cancer or menopause; exploring alternative expressions of spirituality; establishing workplace equality and equitable pay; exploring non-traditional ventures in business, science, trades; understanding workplace or educational sexual harassment; searching for identities in cultural context; and organizing against oppression in all forms based on gender, race, class, age, sexuality, disability, language, ethnicity. Sometimes they simply wanted enjoyable fiction resonating, voicing, and reflecting women's multiple experiences. My experience is not unique. Many bookstore workers report meeting women for whom access to feminist and women's literature and print resources gave them sustenance and strength (Corrigan, 1996; Seajay, 1992).

In the late 1980s and early 1990s some emerging consciousness related to women’s literacy began to take hold for me. Disconnected events became pieces of a larger mosaic: media discourse on illiterate America; growing numbers of federal programs addressing literacy; a well-read friend who listened to all her books on tape; women I met while volunteering at a battered women’s shelter who could not complete various forms or applications; complaints of friends&endash;avid readers who thought feminist writings were too academic and unnecessarily complicated; my own struggle to understand highly theoretical writings. These events began to spark my interests in issues of literacy for women.

In the hazy background of pre-consciousness, I slowly (real slowly) became aware of the large numbers of women who could not read very well. The feminist movement in general and women’s publishers in particular had not discussed or addressed these concerns.² In my growing awareness, I wondered why the women’s presses neither pursued issues of women’s literacy nor more consistently published easier-to-read women’s materials. Feminist and women’s bookstores had not focused on these issues either. In January 1993, I had the opportunity to work for a feminist publisher. In one of the early conversations about the publishing program, I remember suggesting we consider publishing some easier-to-read materials for women. No one at the press embraced this suggestion and I ended up not working there long enough to pursue it further. However, the initial glimmer of an idea to create a non-profit feminist literacy publishing began to emerge.

New Understandings&endash;or How Literacy Found Me (1993-1998)

During the five-year period between 1993-1998, several simultaneous events helped me to develop my thinking and awareness of women’s literacy issues and the potential need for women-centered literacy materials. The topic of literacy found me. Initially quite vague, it took a couple of years for the full epiphany about women’s literacy to take hold. One day while working at Amazon Bookstore,³ I was struggling to read some seemingly obtuse piece of academic feminist theoretical writing. The meaning of it and purpose for it completely eluded me. Why did the writer have to make it so hard and complicated, the thoughts so incomprehensible? The piece both frustrated and angered me. In that instant, the "aha!" moment struck. I intuitively guessed that perhaps 80% of the books and magazines in my feminist bookstore were likely incomprehensible to an unacceptably large number of women who did not have the ability to read them.

Shortly thereafter, I discovered and read Something in My Mind Besides the Everyday by Jenny Horsman (1990). This book profoundly affected my thinking and direction. From it, I not only learned something about the lives of the women for whom print literacy presents challenges, but it also pushed me to consider what it means to be literate.⁴ I also came across the 1988 issue of Canadian Women's Studies (Cox & Sanders, 1988) devoted to women and literacy which further deepened my understanding. These books informed my thinking and strengthened my resolve to learn more about the issues and realities affecting women’s literacy. What else did I need to understand? Were other feminist activists aware of these issues? Did I miss that conversation somewhere? If I could do something as a feminist print activist, what should it be? I began to think about ways in which feminist bookstores and publishers could recognize and address the issues of women's literacy. As women concerned with women’s literary and print heritage, why were we not paying attention to the larger yet basic issues of women’s literacy?

Given my book industry expertise, I decided a reasonable solution would be to create a non-profit publishing company to produce feminist and women-centered literacy materials. But why had this not been done before? Were there easier-to-read authentic adult books and materials available but simply unknown to me? How was it possible that in all my years of experience I had never seen them? Were they primarily limited to distribution in literacy programs? If they were available, what were they and how were they being used? Did they address women’s issues? Would it not make sense to stock them in the bookstore in order to make them more easily attainable? In addition to increasing my knowledge about literacy issues and readability techniques, what did I need to understand about literacy publishing, generally and specifically? And so, my search for understanding began.

During this time, I also worked as a consultant for a distributor of small and independent press books.⁵ They became the distributor to bookstores for Signal Hill, an imprint of New Readers Press associated with Laubach Literacy Action.⁶ Again, literacy found me&endash;I was beginning to find my place. I began to see what books were available in basic literacy. From the Signal Hill selection, I was able to get some general books accessible for women new readers onto the shelves at Amazon Bookstore. This pointed a new direction for me&endash;to develop a Resource List of women-centered reading materials and curriculum.

I began to actively explore more options, starting with a discussion among my colleagues at Amazon Bookstore about our responsibility as a feminist woman’s bookstore to consider ways to address women’s literacy issues. With their support and encouragement but with no real understanding of what I was doing, I drafted a position paper stating the importance for Amazon Bookstore to take a leadership role for women’s literacy in our bookselling and feminist communities. As it happened, the availability of the position paper corresponded with the bookstore’s 25^th anniversary in 1995 (see Appendix Amazon Bookstore 25).

I view collaborative networking as central to feminist activism. Therefore, to explore what suggestions or programs could work through Amazon Bookstore, I contacted the established local literacy organization, Minnesota Literacy Council (MLC -- www.themlc.org). Their Executive Director at the time proposed we do some fundraising for them. But this was not our strength and, as a feminist bookstore active in local communities, we wanted to do work more directly with women. Fortunately, the E.D. also provided names of other people at MLC who might have additional ideas for us. I made a succession of phone calls that proved discouraging.

Persistence pays off, though. In early 1995, I was contacted by Julie Thalhuber, then community outreach coordinator at MLC. A report had recently been published by Laubach Literacy Action called By Women / For Women (1995) addressing the issues and barriers for women achieving literacy. Julie invited me to meet with her and several other women directors of literacy learning centers in the Twin Cities. Having read the report, the group brainstormed some activities to address women's literacy issues in general. Using the expertise of the bookstore, we also discussed the possibility of creating new readers book discussion groups for women.

Subsequent meetings were held at MLC as the group enthusiastically decided to keep meeting. Over time, Julie and I became the co-facilitators of what became known as Women Leading Through Reading (WLTR). She had the institutional support, funding, and staff to keep the work moving forward. I provided much of the action energy, vision and direction to keep our work productive. When it became time to call for volunteers or financial support, I also had access to Amazon Bookstore's mailing list and newsletter. The learning center coordinators became the steering committee.

In the Fall of 1995, Julie and I piloted a 6-week book discussion group at Amazon Bookstore for women learners. Steering committee members referred the participating women learners. Although only two women participated in the book group, this initial effort gave us some insight and encouragement to pursue the sponsorship of book groups for women learners in an on-going way.

From that experience, the steering committee for Women Leading Through Reading coalesced. We described Women Leading Through Reading as an initiative co-sponsored by MLC and Amazon Bookstore with a two-fold purpose:

1. to raise awareness about the particular challenges women face as they seek to enhance their education
2. to explore alternative ways for women to improve their literacy skills⁷

We had a logo designed to increase the visibility and distinctiveness of the initiative. By the fall of 1996, we began to coordinate with learning centers in the Twin Cities area that wanted to sponsor book groups. We trained volunteer book group facilitators. As WLTR started to gain momentum, the numbers of book groups and volunteers increased.

Women Leading Through Reading developed several opportunities to raise awareness and to educate about women’s literacy. We designed a series of six articles (www.litwomen.org/wltr.html#six) about women's literacy for the MLC newsletter. I facilitated a book group at Amazon Bookstore centered on women’s literacy using the Laubach Report (1995), Horsman (1990) and Cox (1988) as our booklist. We pursued a feature article in The Minnesota Women's Press newspaper (Thorson, 1996). It elicited a lot of interest as women called to volunteer and people sent money donations to support the work. Those donations were used to cover travel expenses and childcare for the learners as well as to purchase reading materials.

Additionally, I produced a half-hour radio documentary about the book groups. In honor of International Women’s Day (March 8), it aired on the local community radio station (Miller, 1997). The program included taped interviews with women from two different book groups about their experiences. Their voices and stories were included in the program, and provided the steering committee with its first glimpse into the success of the books groups and women learner’s enthusiasm for them. For some of the learners, it was their first experience of participating in a women-only group. That not only stretched their awareness but also gave them a different opportunity to talk about readings and experiences relevant to their lives. One woman said, "We want more women to join our group so we can learn more about different cultures and learn more from each other. I told my friends they should come. We learn a lot" (Women Leading Through Reading, 1997).

Women Leading Through Reading then received a grant from Women in Literacy/Laubach Literacy Action International (http://www.womeninliteracy.org/index2.html) in order to produce a best practices manual about how to organize book groups (Women Leading Through Reading, 1997; revised by Miller, 2000). This provided a way to share our book group experiences with literacy centers across the state of Minnesota. Additionally, as a way to open dialog among the feminist bookselling network, I published an article about Amazon Bookstore’s experience with Women Leading Through Reading in our trade publication, Feminist Bookstore News (Miller, 1996 - see Appendix FBN).

In 1998, Julie left MLC and the members of the WLTR steering committee began to change due to personal life issues and changes in work settings. Also, the WIA (Workforce Investment Act) was taking effect and the numbers of women learners available to participate in the book groups dropped off. In order for WLTR to change direction&endash;for example, branching into social service and more community-based organizations as was suggested&endash;we would need more time and energy than anyone could commit at that time. We needed more consistent financial support and a person with numbers of available hours to carry forward the work. After being denied several grants, the opportunity to continue became more difficult. For those reasons, Women Leading Through Reading temporarily suspended activities. In the meantime, individual learning centers continued their already established book groups. I occasionally facilitate book groups on my own and provide in-service training about the book groups to literacy workers. I maintain a presence for WLTR on a website (www.litwomen.org/wltr.html) and respond to occasional inquires resulting from it.

In October of 1996, I had made a WLTR presentation at the Minnesota Literacy Council annual conference. There I first met Jane Hugo, Director of Women in Literacy (WIL/USA) for Laubach Literacy Action. She introduced me to materials from CCLOW (Canadian Congress for Learning Opportunities for Women - http://www.nald.ca/cclow.htm). CCLOW has been significant for me because they published a number of feminist books on curriculum and women’s literacy programs, and they modeled a national organization of women literacy practitioners and learners who worked together to discuss and research areas of women’s literacy. There is no such comparable organization in the United States. CCLOW gave me some insight into the kind of work that is possible among feminists who understand literacy issues as connected to women’s oppression.⁸

Meeting Jane Hugo also became an important piece of my journey. Not only did she appreciate the liberatory and political thinking related to the book groups, but also as a feminist, she understood my general concerns about women’s literacy as connected to larger social justice concerns for women. She helped me to understand some larger issues about the literacy field and specific programs and generously pointed me towards resources from across the country and Canada, including a huge bibliography of reading materials about women's literacy.⁹ She consistently examples the importance of networking as she introduced me at conferences to other literacy workers with concerns and directions similar to my own. She has been an important mentor and colleague as I have developed my understanding of women's literacy issues.

Reflections for Next Steps

All of these initial activities raised many questions and concerns for me. First, they focused my awareness on the need for women-centered literacy materials. The facilitators discovered that finding high-interest, low-level materials responding to the interests of women learners proved time consuming and difficult. The resources of the learning centers were limited and site coordinators/teachers themselves had difficulty locating women-centered materials. I began to listen as literacy workers complained about the absence of materials available&endash;especially on topics such as domestic violence, health issues, parenting, workplace issues like harassment, or even, simply, works of fiction. Materials were either too expensive, too difficult to get, too low of a reading level, too high of a reading level, not available on topics women wanted to read, or too lengthy for the book group time period. Facilitators began to rely on reams of copied articles or shorter pieces from larger books. Some used magazine articles and newspapers. Few groups used actual books. I began to collect lists of what the book group facilitators used to pass on to the next groups and to add to the growing Resource List.

As a feminist bookseller, I created a section of literacy materials within the bookstore. It ended up being one short shelf and included some young adult books, especially bibliographies (avoiding juvenile look and content). Making this section visible in the store and to the community of literacy workers and accessible to women learners proved to be a harder step. Even the development of an educational discount program for teachers and literacy workers had limited success. Generally, few people used this resource. Limited use of the section and publisher requirements for buying minimums made the stocking of the books impractical. Like other aspects of the bookstore, social political commitment does not always connect to economic feasibility. I learned that maintaining and promoting a selection of literacy resources for women within the bookstore was a labor of love that needed constant attention and commitment of capital. After several years, the section slowly disappeared due to lack of use and neglect. It was worth doing and would be worth repeating with renewed energy and revised strategy.

Many women were enthusiastic to volunteer their time as WLTR book group facilitators. I do not have definitive statistics on the women who volunteered but they were generally (though not exclusively) European-American women in a variety of ages. Their educational and socioeconomic statuses varied but they tended to have some college experience. Most of them were employed at jobs that only permitted them to volunteer in the evenings rather than during the day.¹⁰ Common among these facilitators was their love for reading and their desire to share that love with other women. However, they also generally lacked knowledge about the ways in which literacy issues affect women’s lives.

I also do not know about the quality of their facilitation skills or what specifically happened in each book group. Midway through each book group cycle, the steering committee sponsored support sessions for all the volunteer facilitators and sponsoring site coordinators. During those sessions, facilitators talked about their experiences and what they found particularly challenging or rewarding. Literacy workers shared what they heard from the learners in their site&endash;if they knew. We did not hear complaints from the sponsoring sites and sometimes literacy workers would request the facilitators return for a second cycle. The steering committee assumed effectiveness due to a lack of complaint.

However, I began to reflect on the racial and cultural implications of this work. For the most part, the women who participated in the books groups as learners were from a variety of racial and ethnic and economic backgrounds. Through my knowledge of the participating sites, most (admittedly not all) of the learners were immigrants or U.S. born women of color&endash;though I have no real demographics for this. What did it mean for a white, educationally privileged, woman to volunteer for literacy work in this context? What were the power dynamics? What aspects of dominant culture were being assumed and reinforced? What did it mean for me? How could I most effectively reevaluate my own journey as women doing anti-oppression work? How and when was I being patronizing towards women learners? What was I doing to foster their leadership? How did WLTR connect to feminist activism?

For the most part, I could only ponder these questions quietly. The WLTR steering committee did not address these issues directly though we intentionally included a component of cultural awareness in the facilitator training sessions. There were one or two individual members on the steering committee who understood this tension. For the most part, though, I found myself needing to be careful about how political I was in presenting my thoughts on women's literacy. What efforts individual facilitators made to address cultural differences and prejudices were unknown to me. It remained an on-going concern for me about the potentially patronizing dynamic of liberal, nice "white girls" doing good works for those supposedly less fortunate than ourselves. Though sharing a love for reading has importance, I worried that cultural imperialism went unrecognized. Though women on the steering committee and some facilitators understood a need for women’s programming, I do not think many of them self-identified as feminists.¹¹ We did not do too much direct critical analysis about women’s literacy issues so approaching race and class-based issues seemed impossible. At that time, introducing cultural awareness was the best we could manage. Perhaps this might have changed if WLTR had continued. I could see the potential for book groups to create possibilities for consciousness-raising and community action.

It was also during this work with Women Leading Through Reading that I began to appreciate the knowledge and experience of literacy workers. The teachers and administrators who worked with WLTR facilitators generously shared information, resources, training expertise and educational insights. I also learned during this time that women learners had a huge interest in the book groups. The women enjoyed the opportunity for literacy learning within a communal atmosphere. As one learner stated during the radio interviews:

[Book group] brings us our own personalities. We learn to communicate with each other as women talking to each other…we help each other out. We talk not only about the books but also about life in general. It’s not only the book but also lifestyles&endash;that’s what’s different about it. (Women Leading Through Reading, 1997)

Another learner said, "We read book by women and when we talk about it, we can talk with each other about women stuff" (Women Leading Through Reading, 1997).

Pursuing information & looking for support mechanisms (1996-1998)

The need to establish some organization to create women-centered literacy materials was coming into sharper focus. My book industry skills were adequate for a publishing venture but I struggled with my lack of knowledge about women’s literacy (in spite of WLTR) and the literacy field in general. I wanted to understand more clearly how the connections between adult education, readability, literacy, poverty and welfare, socio-political-economic issues connected to women's education and social power. I assumed literacy publishing would best be done in a non-profit organization so learning the practicalities how to establish, manage, and run a non-profit entity was essential. I sought programs in which to get this education&endash;time, money, and location were all important factors. At first I looked into the Adult Ed program at the local university but felt it was too narrow in scope for what I wanted to be doing. True to my own educational background and consistent with my reading of Freire, I wanted something in which practice/action was as integral as theory.

My work schedule and income created serious barriers as I became increasingly aware that making the time to do the reading and research was not going to happen easily if I struggled on my own. I was too easily distracted and overwhelmed by the demands and responsibilities in my life. I explored the doctoral program at Union Institute and I applied for several grants. The preparation for these grants challenged me to create independent study activities that included reading from a long bibliography of literacy, educational, socio-political and feminist theories; traveling to various literacy programs around the U.S. and Canada to talk with literacy workers and women learners; and interviewing writers and publishers of literacy materials.

None of the fund-seeking efforts proved successful but I was not idle. I began to build my own educational process&endash;a course on this here and a course on that there. I attended some workshops on non-profit fundraising and grantwriting. I completed a Mini-MBA in Non-Profit Management offered by the Univ. of St. Thomas (Fall 1997).

As I struggled with my frustrations about how to pursue additional education, I found new compassion for women attending literacy programs. One of the difficulties in organizing Women Leading Through Reading book groups had been the challenge for women learners to attend regularly. Transience and consistency (learner retention) are common problems in most literacy programs. Literacy coordinators reported that women had a hard enough time going to their regular classes or meeting with their tutors. The book groups were perceived as leisure rather than learning, an extra rather than something integral. Each site sponsoring book groups addressed this concern in their own way usually incorporating the group into an already established class, tutor time, or related activity. Learners were limited by time, transportation, childcare needs, individual educational goals, jobs and numerous other responsibilities or factors. Sometimes, book groups became just one more thing demanding a woman’s attention.

As an educated women with a car, reliable income, no children or husband,¹² stable housing and other advantages of race and privilege, I still struggled with the economic and time factors limiting my options for pursuing additional education (lifelong learning, as it has come to be known). I could only imagine how much more difficult it might be for women with far more limitations and responsibilities and educational disadvantages than I had! We all had to decide on our priorities, which can shift regularly with new demands, often made without warning. This lead me to ponder, what does it mean for adult women to pursue education given our resources and limitations? In what ways are women all restricted and controlled by institutional structures and requirements that do not necessarily make room for our family, community, economic, cultural and social responsibilities? Perhaps this can become a common denominator from which women can build alliances to address the educational institutions and economic powers that contain us.

Finally, in the Spring of 1998 I audited a course on feminist pedagogies taught by Dr. Lisa Albrecht at the University of Minnesota. This course not only reintroduced me to Freire's work but added feminist theories of pedagogy and cooperative learning, multicultural critiques, learning and teaching styles,¹³ and views of cultures of power. The activities I had been doing for years as a feminist activist were now coming together with some theoretical language. I began to more fully appreciate women-centered literacy publishing&endash;the creation of basic reading materials for women&endash;as a political act, which could perhaps make opportunity for liberatory possibilities. I realized that simply creating a publishing venture that created materials for them (learners) based on whatever I perceived they needed (expert) determined by institutional descriptions of readability, educational practices and literacy to improve their skills (standard curriculum) would not and probably could not be liberating or transformative. I remembered what I had long known&endash;how an organization is structured often determines its overall effectiveness.¹⁴ An organization claiming to change power arrangements must include those changes within its structure. Feminist literacy publishing must somehow integrally include the knowledges and activities of adult women learners and literacy workers. I used the feminist pedagogies class as an opportunity to clarify how an organization committed to producing and distributing women-centered literacy materials might be structured with that participation. I created an outline for an organization theoretically structured to be collaborative and participatory (see Appendix WaterWorks).

Critical Pedagogy - New Knowledge (1998-2000)

By claiming my place the next steps revealed themselves. Lisa Albrecht told me about the Ed.D. in Critical Pedagogy at UST just before the application deadline. I found it unbelievable&endash;a doctoral program with a liberatory and anti-oppression agenda in which to continue my work as a dissertation project within a cohort setting, on a time schedule that I could manage. My partner and I decided to risk the financial burden of a doctoral program: in order to gain the knowledge and information I wanted; to obtain an advanced degree useful for future nonprofit fundraising; to stay focused on the social justice implications of this work; to have the support, library privileges, guidance and structure necessary for the project to really develop.

Within the context of the Ed.D. curriculum, I used the first two years of the program to revisit my book industry and WLTR experiences through the lenses of critical pedagogy. I have tried to bring a distinctly feminist pedagogical aspect to this learning as well. I used this time to build my understanding of literacies; to learn about the variety of literacy programs and their requirements, restrictions, and possibilities; to study the U.S. national agenda for literacy and the socio-economic implications of literacy for women; to investigate some of the general issues surrounding gender and education and specifically, how institutionalized schooling and standards affect women in literacy programs; to appreciate the ways in which access to literacy education is increasingly controlled by social welfare programs and their requirements; to distinguish differences between critical and feminist pedagogies; to become more familiar with multicultural education; to explore the possibilities of popular education and the participatory aspects of learning; to challenge myself to look more consistently through the lenses of race, gender, class, age, ability and sexual orientation; to reflect on my own activities, experiences, and reading of feminist and adult education theories of literacy; to develop stronger foundations for women-centered literacy materials.

These explorations raised a number of theoretical and practical issues for me. I wondered about the liberatory aspects of women-centered literacy materials, especially in relation to publishing and feminist discourse. I debated the ways in which creating women-centered literacy materials maintains the centrality of print-based cultures and socio-economic imperatives about literacy. I wrestled with these larger issues while practical concerns continued to concern me. In spite of my experiences as a feminist bookseller and with Women Leading Through Reading, the answers to three practical questions seemed particularly pivotal before I could continue:

• Do literacy workers and women learners perceive a need for women-centered literacy materials? If so, what do they want?
  
• What women-centered literacy materials already exist? Where can they be found? What are the gaps in terms of subject areas or formats?
  
• If more women-centered literacy materials were available, would they be used?
  

I felt an urgency to do some form of needs assessment. After all, my experiment with stocking literacy materials in the feminist bookstore produced limited benefits for anyone (as far as I could tell). What good would it do to go to the effort of creating a non-profit feminist literacy publishing organization if no one would then use it? This opened up a 4^thquestion: If there is a need for women-centered literacy materials AND adult learners and literacy workers want them, then what are the best ways to produce and distribute these materials? I also pondered some theoretical questions as well:

• Why were there so few authentic basic reading materials for women?
  
• How do the definitions of literacy and the realities of adult literacy education and the practices commercial publishing affect the availability of women-centered literacy materials?
  
• How can women-centered literacy materials address issues of women's power and contribute to the transformation of women's lives and contribute to meaningful social change and just for women?

My first effort to pursue this new direction was to attend the 2^nd International Women and Literacy Conference in Atlanta, GA in 1999. Jane Hugo introduced me to a number of women and my participation in a number of workshops yielded additional contacts. As I described to literacy workers the direction of my questions, they seemed genuinely receptive to and interested in&endash;even excited about&endash;the overall project. I explored the resource area at the conference and discovered only a small number of new items to add to the on-going Resource List. Encouraged by the conversations I was having and supported by limited findings of new materials, I decided to probe further.

I was able to secure a small grant¹⁵ with which to take these questions to a larger audience of literacy workers across the country. I developed a survey and sent it to a variety of literacy programs across the United States based on location, target population, and type of program. The results of this research confirmed my suspicions that there are limited numbers of women-centered literacy materials and that literacy workers generally do perceive a need for them and would use them if they were available (Miller, 2000a).

This research (which I will continue to refer to as Spring 2000) surfaced two new realities that I had not yet considered. As part of the survey, I listed many of the titles from the developing Resource List and asked literacy workers how they used these currently available materials. To my surprise, a large number of these resources were generally unknown to the literacy workers surveyed. They had never used them because they did not know they existed! Secondly, when I was looking for ways to contact literacy workers, I could not identify a national newsletter or publication directed to professional development for literacy workers and tutors.¹⁶ Literacy workers commented on the need to know about new materials, reviews of them, including how other programs have used them, and their effectiveness. Based on these two new insights from literacy workers, my vision of an organization dedicated to women-centered literacy materials began to shift and expand. Publishing itself became less of a concern while review and distribution gained vital importance. Rather than an organization that merely produces materials, a clearinghouse of information and a network of activities would accomplish so much more.

By this point, I became uncomfortably aware that my theoretical interest in literacy was increasingly disconnected from the day-to-day realities of women learners. Because WLTR had ceased regular activities, I lacked continuous contact with women learners. My lack of active connection/practical action concerned me. I was not nor had I ever been a literacy tutor so I had little hands-on experience. My schedule and workload prevented me from tutoring but as it came closer to the time for doing the dissertation project, my lack of experience took on new urgency.

Facilitating a WLTR book group made sense so I contacted the teachers/coordinators of the South Suburban ABE & Literacy Project located in So. St. Paul, MN, who had always been supportive of WLTR. Initially, I contacted Kathy Haines (Volunteer Coordinator) by phone who indicated interest in book group. I followed this with a formal letter to Kathy and Kristin Keller (Program Director and previous steering committee member) updating them on my interests and alluding to the direction of the dissertation project.

Shortly after sending the letter, I received a call from Liz Arend, one of the teachers at Family Learning who wanted me to facilitate a book group for the ABE class sponsored at Family Connections in So. St. Paul. On November 9, 2000, I started going to the Family Learning program for one hour each week and met through the Spring 2001 semester. The reading group became part of their regular curriculum. Initially, my work with this class was NOT intended to have formal connection with the dissertation project, though I was not closed to it as a possibility. I also expected some of the experiences with this group might prove informative about working cooperatively with women learners.

The Family Learning program focuses on parenting skills and parental interactions with their children. Additionally, some of the women work to improve their skills necessary to take the GED test. Liz wanted the book group as part of the overall curriculum in order to encourage the women to strengthen their personal reading skills by reading together on a regular basis. She also wanted to encourage them to read to their children more actively as well. The book group became an opportunity for reading and conversation.

The women had a range of reading skills. We talked about what they wanted to read and what topics interested them. I would bring articles then addressing those interests.¹⁷ As the group continued, their requests would become more numerous and specific for them as individuals and as a group. Sometimes the topics resulted from concerns about their children. More often, though, the topics would be generated from their personal or daily needs or questions.

Initially, in addition to me, the book group was attended by Liz and a tutor who both carried the conversation. This became a little top heavy with teachers and it seemed the women learners were shy, uncomfortable and reticent about discussion and participation in the book group format. One afternoon neither the tutor nor Liz could attend. As it happened, the women seemed much more enthusiastic, interactive and talkative. I mentioned this to Liz who agreed that neither she nor the tutor would continue to participate. This helped the group to thrive and follow their own interests.

However, this did not alleviate all the discussion issues because each week different women attended. After a few weeks, a core group of 3-4 regular attendees developed and other women would come and go as they would from the services of the center in general. When only one or none of the regulars attended, building a format for discussion would have to be re-created.

We did not read any complete book. Center policy kept all materials on-site, so it was not at all feasible for them to read at home between sessions. However, the women also admitted they would not usually read at home as they had little time for reading due to parenting, work and other family obligations. Therefore, I usually brought short pieces related to their interests and requests. The only whole books we read were a few children's books. Because the group changed so much and their interests and attendance varied from week to week, it became difficult to figure out how to choose one book and stick with it over time. I settled this by coming prepared with several options of appeal to different individuals. I would then match the readings with who actually attended the class session.

The group was also good at going off on wild conversation tangents. Women took their time getting settled upon arriving (which was often late) and it was hard for them to stay focused for very long before someone introduced some off-topic conversation. They had a difficult time talking with each other. They mostly wanted to talk to me. Though the tables were arranged in a circular fashion, they often managed to place themselves across from me inadvertently setting up a teacher position. I wanted to foster their leadership&endash;encouraging them to take responsibility for leading a discussion. This generally did not work and mentoring learner leadership is a skill I need to develop better. Their inconsistent attendance&endash;related to factors outside their immediate control (sick children, broken car, uncooperative male companion, sudden eviction, etc.)&endash;made planning difficult.

We mostly related the readings to general life experiences of women in the group. We did a little writing on special projects. Several of them had submitted written short pieces about themselves to a learner publication prepared by the Minnesota Literacy Council&endash;To Open Your Mind. Some of this writing also become the basis for a half-hour radio program we organized for KFAI’s International Women's Day (2001). For this radio show, women wrote short pieces on the theme "Our Day as a Single Mother." Together we chose music to play and each woman took a turn reading her piece live on the air. This proved to be an exciting event for them and one they made extra effort to complete. The experience included the trip to the radio station, and their words broadcasted to listeners across the area. One of the ESL learners got so caught up in the moment and filled with the confidence of her experience she abandoned her prepared writing and spoke directly&endash;and eloquently&endash;from her heart.

Moving to a Dissertation Project

As you have no doubt noticed by now, the focus of this dissertation project has slowly developed over time and rests in years of action and reflection on my part. While all of this exploration with women’s literacy and critical pedagogy was happening, I was still working full-time as a book buyer for Amazon Bookstore Cooperative and being convinced more clearly everyday that some connection needed to be made between women’s literacy and feminist publishing/bookselling. If I had simply wanted to establish a publishing company to produce literacy materials for women, it seems as if I could have (should have?) accomplished that long ago without so much contemplation.¹⁸ But it has been also important for me to understand my place and how my contribution could be meaningfully productive.

I have consistently seen this project located in my experiences through Women in Print&endash;writing, reading, publishing and distributing feminist and women’s words are political and potentially liberatory activities. Doing this work as a feminist committed to social justice and institutional change means that how this happens becomes just as important as when it happens. As a feminist activity, this project necessarily needs to understand power relations, authority, control, knowledge, and privilege not only as they are maintained by institutional systems¹⁹ out there&endash;but also acknowledge how they operate among and between women.

If we are to challenge the myths of illiteracy, we need studies which start from the standpoint of the women who are labeled "illiterate" or "silent." We need to listen to women’s own accounts of their lives. Only in this way can we hope to create programs for women that will meet their needs and enable them to challenge the status quo. (Horsman, 1990, p. 15)

I would add to this that it is not enough to create programs for women learners, but to cooperatively create together communities to nourish, support, respect, and call the best from all of us. Women in Print activists showed what women could do for ourselves in literary access&endash;we took control, learned new skills, demanded place and viability for our voices.²⁰ Freire (1970/1997) talks about co-intentional education. How can I best use my knowledge and experience from Women in Print along with my commitment to making women’s words available to all women? And how do I do this while respecting the knowledges and talents of women who are labeled "illiterate"? How do I centralize their talents and experiences? In working with print-based materials, what does it mean to shift the power balance? When and where do women learners enter?

While I had found literacy workers&endash;based on their experiences with women learners&endash;quite clear about what sorts of women-centered literacy materials they want or could use, I began to wonder if women learners would respond similarly if asked directly themselves. As I began to think about what direction I should take both generally in terms of establishing an organization and specifically in terms of the impending dissertation project, the importance of learner participation became clearer and more pressing. Would women learners respond similarly if asked the same questions? Do women learners care about or perceive a need for women-centered print-based reading or learning materials available at their skill levels? Do they care about these issues? Would they value women’s writings or find print-based information about women’s issues useful? Literacy workers had provided important insights, but what would women learners have to say for themselves on these topics? How would I begin to get this input from women learners? Beginning a process to centralize the insights, literacies, and knowledge bases of adult women learners while building on all these previously mentioned experiences became my guide for this dissertation project.

Claiming My Place - Some Reflections on Reading

In the introduction to Power in Practice (2001), Cervero and Wilson invite practitioners "to make explicit their own political and ethical agendas when investigating a specific adult education program, practice, or policy" (p. xvii). In Knowing Her Place, (from which this essay adapts its name) Lorri Neilsen (1998) not only talks about research, reading and women’s literacies, but she makes a compelling argument for teachers of literature and English to understand and have a sense of themselves as readers. "By digging deeply into an understanding of ourselves as readers, we can expose the broader cultural practices that regulate reading and readers" (p. 78). I agree with her. I would love to tell the full story of my reading journey&endash;but it is too long for here. However, I will share three things about my reading because they have direct impact on the direction of this dissertation project.

First, I don’t read much fiction and when I do, I have to be very careful. I get transported into other worlds so profoundly and completely it proves difficult for me to come back to interact with the day-to-day realities of this one. I have to be sure to have the time, space and energy to live in two worlds&endash;reading fiction becomes a luxury and privilege I do not often allow myself. I am a grossly inadequate bookseller for this reason and extremely grateful for my colleagues who cover for my lack of reading it. But I listen to what everyone says about all kinds of fiction books and actually do make good recommendations based on the gleaned, communal, verbal knowledge I acquire from coworkers, customers, author interviews, and book reviewers.

Secondly, I rarely read a complete book and infrequently do so from beginning to end. I often have several books on a variety of topics going simultaneously. I will skip large sections, skim, move from back to front or start in the middle (most easily done, of course, in anthologies). I often read the last paragraph, page or conclusion first, then decide if the book offers a direction I want to take. (I do this with fiction too.) I usually have a pencil in my hand while I read&endash;making marks and comments in the margins. Recently, I have also started reading with a pencil and large post-it notes to stick on the pages as I dialog with them. I often prefer to read alternative and political magazines and newspapers. Recently I have added alternative websites and e-list discussions. I almost never read the daily newspaper&endash;preferring alternative radio and Free Speech TV (http://www.freespeechtv.org) as my news sources.

Finally, and most importantly, I view reading as an access to information, power and knowledge. I grew up in an authoritarian setting (home, school, church, community, and government). I did not trust what I was told, and discussion was more about criticism and suppression rather than community building and coming to higher consciousness! I love having and collecting books because it means the knowledge is around me all the time. Being able to read has meant being able to go and find things on my own&endash;to access alternative viewpoints and information. It opened my world while saving my life. Reading has been how I could be smart and valuable. It has been how I could escape being a stereotypical girl and compete with educated male privileges. Reading has been my access to voices and viewpoints of women’s lives and experiences unfamiliar to me and out of my cultures. It has helped me to learn so much more about other women in so many different places.²³ And reading has been the way to my-self as I have been able to know about the cultures of me hidden from and misrepresented in the malestream²⁴ -- lesbian, woman, mixed-class, fat person. Being able to read has also provided privacy to explore thoughts and feelings I did not feel safe talking about or knew were socially unacceptable (liking girls, feeling suicidal, exploring sexuality, hating my parents, whatever). Reading has been how I have found my voice and courage to speak for social justice and become an activist for my own liberation. It is how I form theory to strengthen my action. Doing that reading in a variety of political/feminist action communities has enriched my reading to more intensity and fruitfulness.

"When we understand what shapes us as readers, we are better able to see our part in shaping or reproducing the instructional context" (Neilsen, 1998, p. 65). This knowledge about my own reading makes me such a strong advocate for women-centered literacy materials. My interest stems not so much for the love of reading but for the access to power through print&endash;the strength of community we can build and the possibility for collective action and liberation. I would like these possibilities to be available for women learners through easier-to-read women-centered materials.

Notes:

1. "Praxis is a complex activity by which individuals create culture and society, and become critically conscious human beings. Praxis comprises a cycle of action-reflection-action, which is central to liberatory education. Characteristics of praxis include self-determination (as opposed to coercion), intentionality (as opposed to reaction), creativity (as opposed to homogeneity), and rationality (as opposed to chance)." "Conscientization is an ongoing process by which a learner moves toward critical consciousness). This process is the heart of liberatory education. It differs from "consciousness raising" in that the latter frequently involves "banking" education--the transmission of pre-selected knowledge. Conscientization means breaking through prevailing mythologies to reach new levels of awareness--in particular, awareness of oppression, being an "object" in a world where only "subjects" have power. The process of conscientization involves identifying contradictions in experience through dialogue and becoming a "subject" with other oppressed subjects--that is, becoming part of the process of changing the world." (Heaney, 1995, On-line)

2. At that point, I had already been working in the book industry for 10 years.

3. Amazon Bookstore Cooperative, Minneapolis, MN. Founded in 1970, it is the oldest existing feminist bookstore in North America. I have been a cooperative worker-owner since 1995. www.amazonbookstorebookstorecoop.com

4. I will explore additional reflections of the meanings of literacy in the dissertation section I call Something in My Mind: Paradigms of Literacy & Publishing Politics.

5. Consortium Books Sales & Distribution (CBSD)

6. New Readers Press experimented with Signal Hill imprint for less than two years. The purpose of this program, and their distribution through CBSD, was to develop the availability of some literacy materials through the general trade bookstore markets. New Readers generally publishes many reading instruction series and manuals. However, they also do some general interest fiction and non-fiction titles, which they moved to the Signal Hill imprint line. After the short period of experimentation of distributing to the general bookstore trade, New Readers discontinued the Signal Hill imprint and absorbed the titles back into their regular New Readers catalog.

7. For more detailed information about Women Leading Through Reading, see Appendix WLTR FAQs or go to www.litwomen.org/wltr.html

8. I realized early on that most of the provocative feminist work on women's literacy was coming from Canada.

9. Much later, I realized it was the preliminary bibliography of Susan Imel and Sandra Kerka (1996).

10. Programs with day schedules, then, could rarely sponsor WLTR books groups.

11. Amazon Bookstore's reputation as a lesbian bookstore seemed to slip under the radar--mostly it was not recognized or discussed. I maintained the visibility of Amazon Bookstore for what it truly was--a feminist, women's bookstore for all people.

12. Though I do have family commitments with my partner, ours is a household in which we share responsibilities. So, the familial stresses relevant to single moms or women living in abusive situations or complicated by culturally traditional requirements were not relevant to me.

13. I have strong tendencies (almost equal in strength) toward abstract random and concrete random styles.

14. I had been discussing institutional power arrangements for years while working with community women's centers, activist organizations, and other groups.

15. Graduate Student Research Award for Topics Related to Women, Luann Dummer Center for Women, Univ. of St. Thomas, 1999-2000.

16. National organizations such as Laubach and Literacy Volunteers of America or National Institute for Literacy may have member newsletters. But there are no regularly produced national or professional publications by which to make announcements or discuss curriculum development, research trends, political issues or by which to review new books and so on. All of these things happen haphazardly through various smaller or academic organizations that by and large do not have membership among literacy teachers and tutors. Laubach and LVA depend on annual and biennial conferences for most of this work. Both organizations have mailing lists to which they send their own catalogs of publications. However, as far as I know, they do not send any form of regular publication or organizational newsletter for literacy workers or tutors.

17. I managed to successfully select readings in their collective range, though sometimes I erred either too hard or too easy.

18. Though raising the capital would have been a serious obstacle.

19. Government, economy, education, religion, culture, social services, political, etc. held in place through racism, classism, sexism, ableism, heterosexism, ageism

20. More detail for this will be provided in Something in My Mind.

21. For example, KFAI (www.kfai.org) and Democracy Now (http://www.democracynow.org)

22. I could not begin to tell you the numbers of books in my house that I have not read but I generally know what the content of all of them is. I'm kind of a book junky. My girlfriend calls it "a sickness" in that loving, endearing way. In this way, I am a frustrated librarian / archivist.

23. This is not only about race, class, and culture but also about violence, abuse, disability, art & music, spirituality, historical context and so much more.

24. A term coined by Mary O'Brien in 1981 then taken up by Dale Spender.

Cervero, R.M. & Wilson, A.L. (2001). Power in practice: Adult education and the struggle for knowledge and power. San Francisco, CA: Jossey-Bass.

Corrigan, T. (1996). Feminist bookstores: Part of an ecosystem. In Berman, S. & Danky, J.P., (eds.). Alternative Library Literature, 1994/1995: A biennial anthology (pp. 59-61). Jefferson, NC: McFarland & Co.

Cox, R., & Sanders, L. (1988). Women & literacy. Canadian Woman Studies / les cahiers de la femme, 9 (3 & 4), .

Freire, P. (1970/1997). Pedagogy of the oppressed: New revised 20th-anniversary edition. New York: Continuum.

Heaney, T. (1995). Issues in Freirean Pedagogy. Thresholds in Education, [On-line], http://nlu.nl.edu/ace/Resources/Documents/Freireissues.html.

Horsman, J. (1990). Something in my mind besides the everyday: Women and literacy. Toronto: Women's Press, Canada.

Imel, S. & Kerka, S. (1996). Women and literacy: Guide to the literature and issues for woman-positive programs. Washington, DC: Office of Educational Research and Improvement, (ERIC Document Reproduction Service No. ED 400 381).

Laubach Literacy Action, (1995). By women / for women: A beginning dialogue on women and literacy in the United States. Syracuse, NY: Laubach Literacy Action.

Miller, M. (1996). Amazon bookstore: Literacy skills for women. Feminist Bookstore News, 19 (1), 21-23.

Miller, M. (Producer). (1997). Women leading through reading. In Miller, M. & Azora-Minda, C., (Co-Producers.). International Women's Day, March 8, Special 24-hour Progamming. Minneapolis, MN: KFAI Community Radio.

Miller, M. (1999). Feminism and literacy for women: Politics and resources. Feminist Collections, 21, 17-20.

Miller, M.E. (2000). Feminist resources and curriculum for women achieving literacy. Minneapolis, MN.: Research was made possible with a grant from The LuAnn Dummer Center for Women Graduate Student Research Award, 1999-2000. Univ. of St. Thomas. , (ERIC Document Reproduction Service No. ED 445 250).

Miller, M. (2000). Women Leading Through Reading. Book groups: Making a difference (Revised Edition), [On-line], www.litwomen.org/wltr.html.

Neilsen, L. (1998). Knowing her place: Research literacies and feminist occasions. San Francisco, CA: Caddo Gap Press.

Seajay, C. (1992, July/August). 20 years of feminist bookstores. MS., 3(1) , 60-61.

Thorson, J. (1996). Poetic justice: Twin Cities women learn the power of literacy. The Minnesota Women's Press, 12 (18) Nov. 27 - Dec. 10, 1 & 6-7.

Women Leading Through Reading, , Thalhuber, J. and Miller, M. with Zoellner, A. (1997). Book groups: Making a difference. St. Paul, MN: Minnesota Literacy Council.